Thursday, March 25, 2010

The Original... Colin Tu.

Ok, so here's how the gig goes. My good friend Drew has a fondness for a certain story from his past. This is my attempt to capture the essence of that story. Future posts may or may not use this original post as a base. Who knows? Check back and we'll see.

Interesting Steve (abbreviated IS) and Bob (short for Bobdonius) are walking home from school when the front door of a nearby house creaks open and Colin Tu steps out.

Colin Tu: Hi, guys!

(IS sighs)

Bob: Hi Colin.

Colin Tu: No, no, no! It's Colin Tu!

Bob: Right... Forgot.

Colin Tu: You guys wanna come play RPG?

IS: What's RPG?

Colin Tu: You don't know what RPG is? It's only like the best game ever invented! So what do
you say, do you want to come play?

Bob: Uh, sure, why not.

IS: Dude!

Bob: Oh come on, he doesn't have any friends.

Colin Tu: I'm right here you know...

IS: Okay, Colin. Let's go play RPG.

*Up in Colin Tu's Room*

Colin Tu: Okay, first we need to decide what kind of characters we are. Interesting Steve, you can be a dwarf fighter.

IS: But I don't want to be a dwarf.

Colin Tu: And Bob, you'll be the human paladin.

Bob and IS exchange glances and shrug.

Colin Tu: Okay! Let's get started! So, your standing on the Wall of Britannia! What do you do?

IS: (mumbled) This is stupid...

Bob: We go east?

Colin Tu: Ya can't.

Bob: Why not?

Colin Tu: Ya just can't.

Bob: Okay, we go north.

Colin Tu: Ya can't.

Bob: We go south?

Colin Tu: Ya can't.

Bob: (sighing) We go west?

Colin Tu: Okay! So you're heading west along the Wall of Britannia! The wall is like... a million miles long! So you guys walk for like a hundred years. A lot of interesting stuff happens in-between. The human fighter gets really old, and the dwarf gets grumpy. So, after a hundred years you've finally reached the end of the Wall of Britannia, and at the end of the wall is a fearsome dragon! What do you do?

IS: We attack.

Colin Tu: Okay, roll the dice.

*Interesting Steve rolls*

Colin Tu: Oh... not good enough! And the dragon eats you! Quickly, human paladin, what do you do?

Bob: Um, I cast a holy spell at it?

Colin Tu: But the dragon has magic resistance and doesn't notice your puny spell. Then he eats you too!

IS: Well that was fun-

Colin Tu: With the puny mortals out of his way the dragon takes all of your stuff and gives it to me! I mean... someone who looks like me.

Bob: Right...

IS: Well, we're going to go Colin...

Colin Tu: Wait!

Bob: What?

Colin Tu: You guys wanna play RPG?

*Exit Interesting Steve and Bobdonius, both shaking their heads*

*Disclaimer: All names have been changed for the sake of the parties involved. Any relation they have to any person, real or fictitious, is simply awesome*


  1. i was thinking about this story the other day. i remember you telling it hahaha fantastico.

  2. How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a light bulb? WANNA RIDE A BIKE?

  3. Hahaha this is Awesome! Rumor had it there was thoughts of a web comic?
    If anyone is curious here is a cut and paste to what started it all.